Thursday, December 8, 2011

commit




Today at counseling S and I were given some homework to complete before our next meeting.  We were to  write our commitment to each other and describe how we were going to bring our best to the marriage spiritually, mentally and physically.  And explain if we are willing to do what it takes to work on the marriage.

What an assignment!

This is what I have so far...

Lord, I commit myself to YOU and to my marriage with S.  I have faith that through your Holy work, our marriage can be healed.  (“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10:23) I know that this healing will come from you, Lord.  I have hope in YOU and promise to do my part.  (Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your paths.”) I commit myself to the task of being the best ME I can be…knowing that by working on myself will lead me to being the best wife I can be. 
I will bring my best to my marriage spiritually by: 
·      Continuing to attend Bible study, to dig into YOUR word and be accountable to the women in my group.
·      I will recommit myself to my quiet time in the morning knowing that it is important to me (and you) to set the tone of my day with a focus on YOU. 
·      I commit myself to “speaking the truth in love” as Paul says in Eph 4:15.
 I will bring my best to my marriage physically by : 
·      Continuing to walk on the beach on Mondays with Staci and recommit myself to some sort of physical activity 3 days a week for at least an hour.  
·      Making better choices as to what I choose to put into my body.  I commit to making healthier eating choices for myself.
 I will bring my best to my marriage emotionally by:       
·      Continuing to spend time with close friends who fill my tank.
·      Continuing to seek wise counsel and to continue my work with Marianne and Kim. 
·      Committing to taking time for myself each week - to take photographs, to sew or garden and to use the gifts YOU have given me.  I commit to journaling to honor the process YOU have designed for me, Lord.
 I am willing to work toward forgiveness and put aside past hurts.  (“Love is not self seeking, it’s not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrong.”  1 Cor. 13:5) 
I commit to being obedient to GOD and willing to do what it takes, for as long as it takes to heal this marriage.
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Still unsure as to how all of this will play out...blogging about such personal issues I mean.  Not the marriage.  I have great hope that we are on the right track...fingers crossed and praying that I am not setting myself up for heart ache yet again.  More to work out with regard to being vulnerable and "risking it all".

But oh, so happy to be writing again!

Yay!!!

2 comments:

  1. eren. this is beautiful, raw and so vulnerable. i admire your courage & authenticity sharing, processing & writing where others can read, relate, support, pray, encourage & grow along side with you & for you.

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  2. Praying for you, Eren. I sensed in your absence that some big stuff was going on. Blessings to you in this new year. Beth

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